assholes · empowerment · fuck-it mountain · fucktards · Onward and upward

Anatomy of a Fucktard

What makes a fucktard a fucktard? And later, I will tell you the MOST important question of all. But let’s look at a fucktard…we need to be clear on what we are dealing with.

A fucktard has no regard for you, your emotions, your preferences, your desires, your ideas, your interests, your accomplishments, or anything that defines you as a person. A fucktard might even ENJOY keeping you from things you love. He might keep you from your friends. Motherfucker might even GASLIGHT. I knew one who would NEVER stoop to changing his schedule so his wife could have a night out without kids, yet he told EVERYONE how he wished his wife would go out, feigning concern, epitomizing bullshit. People would say, “oh, what a caring husband he is”, not realizing how full of horse shit he was. That’s all gaslighting is: bullshitting…lying…twisting the truth. Spit shining the turd. This is quintessential fucktard: being a bullshit liar, shining himself real good so he appears to be this fucking AWESOME slice of man-pie the likes of which you’ve never seen! And then the truth starts to seep out. He is not any kind of Jesus or Buddha or Savior. He is a fucktard.

Many other things define fucktards. They are shitty just for fun. They are petty and obsess over fucking people over, especially you. They have lost their fucking humanity. Fucktards are users and some are smart enough to do a lot of heavy manipulating.

Fucktards get super pissed when you point out their fucktardiness or when you dare to get your bitch on through honest and healthy confrontation. Or honestly, ANY kind of communication that involves acknowledging that you are a person. They get so pissed that they become like a toddler and say “I’m going to get you back!” And they do retaliate in some way. They say, “I’m taking my toys and going home!!” And they do take their toys, and yours too. They cannot share, they cannot NOT have their way, and they cannot see outside of their narrow-minded bullshit world.

If you want to look up the labels in the DSM, you are welcome to. Fucktards are basically Cluster B personalities. But who gives a shit. A fucktard by any other name is still a fucktard. They aren’t going to get help because they venerate their own fucktard status. So let’s help them out and call it because we see it. Being  a fucktard confers certain benefits when you have others who buy into the bullshit. In fact, life with a fucktard or dating a fucktard becomes just like the “Bizarro World” episode on Seinfeld. There was a unicycle instead of a bike on the wall, and everything was changed around and opposite itself and completely odd and totally off. Yet once you’ve had your awakening on fuck-it mountain, you come to realize how totally fucked up it is for others to be so goddamn happy rolling around in fucktard shit. Let the pigs roll, bitches. We have other things to do.

If you marry a fucktard, it is like marrying England, or marrying Patriarchy. You will never be able to get out from that thumb unless you have money and can baby them. Fucktards love money, especially money they do not earn or deserve.

There are lot of weird things about fucktards, and maybe as we get rolling here, readers can write in with their own fucktard bizarro-world stories and we can all laugh and cry at the same time.

The bigger, more important question, is, “How did I end up with a fucktard???”

That is the most important question ever, because it is the root of healing and will help you become a total, radically honest, congruent, powerful, well-voiced bitch. But do not beat up on yourself and give up. This fucked-up journey is a gift…any awakening is painful, but you are awake and alive and can feel! This is why you are here…to heal, to make peace with yourself, to make sure you have all the power of your cunt in your own hands and not with some fucktard. This is balls-to-the-wall transformation and growth. It’s gonna suck and the fucktard is still gonna be fucked up. But you get to USE him to be better, to find yourself, to make good out of shit. While fucktard and his blind followers are spit-shining turds, you are taking the bullshit and slowly composting it, using it to fertilize your creativity, your blessed, holy anger, and allowing it to grow your new life.


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